Santa Clause Frightens Children!

Sunday Dec. 14th Price, Ut.
Amy Rasmussen Reporting

It seems as though Santa Clause has been frightening children in the Carbon County area. Witnesses confirm this perpetrator seemed friendly upon arrival, but within seconds of his greeting- "Ho, Ho, Ho!" says one witness, the children in attendance soon became frightened and bewildered by the presence of this jingle bell adorned stranger. Children, Carter and Dawson Rasmussen were the most recent victims to this holiday caper. Once inside the home of Great-Grandmother, Colleen Neeley, Santa began waiving his arms about and shouting out words to "Jingle Bells," loud enough to shake every ornament on the quite elderly woman's home. Reports of this strange behavior have been reported in other parts of the state as well. Sources cannot locate the exact location of this jolly old gentleman, but recent reports did confirm he and his accomplice, Mrs. Clause a.k.a. Judy- did flee the scene in a large red and gold sleigh, licence plate MRY XMAS. Make and model, unknown. The suspect is said to be approx: 6' 8" and weight: "large, with a belly that jiggles like a bowl full of jelly." Mrs. Clause is short and quite. Clothing is a long red dress and white bonet. She carries a red velvet bag with suspicious red and white, hook shaped weapons. Possibly hazardous.

If there is any information regarding this individual and his recent activities, please contact your nearest Elf Headquarters.

Other unlawful behaviors that have been reported: Admits to breaking and entering family homes through the chimney, animal abuse to 8 or 9 tiny reindeer, carries a large bag of potentially stolen toys (claims to have made them in his "workshop") and eats and eats cookies and milk without permission.